Why can’t I quit?

Today when I picked up the phone my mom bellowed and enraged that why haven’t I called her since two days and, when I told her the usual excuse that I was so busy to call her, she enquired and asked me the most dreading question ever.
She asked me why haven’t I quit, when I promised I wouldn’t do anything for the college committee’s anymore. I had nothing to say but, silence, enduring the dreading silence made me leave the world and off I went to my thought land, again.
The only thing this time bothering me and boggling my mind was that why can’t I quit. It’s like I have AA, something I have to do once everyday. I don’t like to be like this but still?. It has also been claimed and I definitely believe that I also have ADD, and these psychological “diseases” make it hard for me to quit. And make me do these tasks that I don’t want to repeat anymore.
Once again I woke up to my mom asking me that if I am in my dream world again or not?, this shook me up and made me realize that I have just spent my crappy 10 minutes listening to something that my mom might have said, that is saved somewhere in my subconscius mind as my conscius cortex was dipping in the pool of the imaginery land where I often leap on to…………….


WordPress- A loud cry

If wordpress people are listening can you please give me a reason why there is no app or widget for symbian phones, I don’t think there will be any compatibility issues, why is everyone so hostile towards Symbian. Symbian’s good, try to make an app for it and you’ll see how many people will download it every day.

Nokia N900

If anyone from Nokia is listening I plead them to give me a free Nokia n900 to review so that I get a free Nokia n900 and they have a free publicity and review, I hope 1 phone wouldn’t be that much of a hassle and they give those out anyways for reviews and publicity.

Nokia N900

Why can’t i make sure what I want after buying such a beautiful and useful phone Nokia 5800, I wanna buy Nokia n900. I love this phone maemo is awesome. I want nokia guys to make my phone’s symbian just like maemo 5, i mean they have already added qt to symbian phones. Hope they release a firmware update very soon making my phone just as awesome as Maemo 5.

Want this if some one is giving it out for free.

They tell me don’t cry

Why shouldn’t I cry,

if this is the world I live in then God, let me better die.

As change seems to be just an illusion,

everyone tells me to be secluded and tells this state is confusion

but this fruit is ripe and sour

crying, gushing out juices it’s scarred

if this situation prevails

apocalypse wont be the end

but us, the humans, as Satans

will put ourselves to death sentence

By harshit151989 Posted in SHIT Tagged

The Twisted Spoon

Yesterday in mess during lunch i was in a hurry to have my ofcourse lunch, so i was rushing through the daily ordeal of picking up plate filling it with the subsidiaries like salad, onion, pickle, and then a spoon, but as these have become my reflexes i don’t even look at what i am taking or even what amount. So, when i moved forward in line to get my dish filled with the not-so-aromatic and “non-yummylicious” vegetables and curd the messwala bhaiya pointed out that the spoon was twisted.

I was sent into a trance as I saw the twisted spoon. What is it that I am doing, totally turned into machine by the system, food the only passion that i enjoy other than writing has also become a bloody fucking reflex. Eating was like sex to me, much better from all the physical pleasures you can get. Eating good food is like “Tantric sex”, the horrible mess food had already destroyed my taste food from first  year itself but then my fucking nervous system. 

Then the thought of what is actually wrong started gushing my mind. What is wrong is the control I am loosing on my surrounding and I think all of us are loosing. We let the situations, the daily procession decide what will happen next each and every moment. Sometimes i doubt are we really living in a matrix like world or not, but whomsoever is the architect, he’s definitely fucked up in his mind as this world what he has developed is nothing but a paradoxical, ambiguous, a-Pandora mistake in short fucked up. 

There is nothing real it seems, people have been predicting that robots will be controlling our lives true but those robots wont be the mechanical-electronic machines but us. We have so much let go of ourselves, we let the unimportant, uneasy, nonsense situations decide our mood. And, I am even doubtful if we even have anymore doubts and feelings as it seems that whatever crap is flying around makes decisions for us. 

I wanna say, No. No to the crap being fed to me, both my stomach and my mind. My body and my soul are not some shit-hole, but pristine pious temple that needs immediate and immaculate actions not some rhetorical crap that makes it suffer more. I cry, I shout from inside, but am made to smile cause the world is ending if not. 2012 will not be by sun or global warming but by us humans, us robots trying to fuck our world.

I shout and start throwing things and then I hear loud gasps and shrill cries, and wake up then i see a horrible scene, destruction that i mounted, my curd and vegetables on the ground, people behind telling me to do stuff like fuck off, jerk off, etc. etc. but what happenes 

Dont see the light

The light that drew me to the verge, seems was meant to attrite me and make me feel bad and change. My issue of being happy, a smiling face and convivial cheerful joyful state doesn’t go coherent with all that is happening. Seems like its great depression in my life. But, no problem, it is not yet time to give up hope. Will try to be happy for a longer time, lets see what future has in store for me.